An 83 year old British gentleman arrived in Paris by plane. As he was fumbling in his bag for his passport a stern French lady asked if he had been to France before. He admitted he had indeed been previously. The lady sarcastically said then you should know to have your passport out and waiting sir. The gentleman said I didn’t have to show it last time. Impossible! The women said, you British have always had to show your passports to get through here. The man responded by whispering “Well, when I came ashore on the beach on D-Day in 1944 I couldn’t find any fucking Frenchmen to show it to!”

daytrippinginpepperland:

today in physics we were told about how our national grid has to get extra power from france and other countries after EastEnders finishes because everyone puts the kettle on to make tea

*Walks down the highstreet*
*stops and sneezes*
Random Person: Bless you
Me: You're Welcome